Happy Easter (?)

I am not Easter today but twenty-two. If you did not laugh at that please exit immediately. Thank you.

Aside from you not noticing how my introduction rhymed, you also did not laugh but are still here.

Thank you.

For staying.

Here.

Never have I ever actually witnessed and appreciated my life this much until this year. I hate to admit this but when Kobe Bryant died and people mourned for days and even up to now, I was having the best days and nights with my friends in the city. While the Philippine government continued and continues to show its incompetency, I was, and still am, thanking the heavens each day that I still get to live because I have been doing so well and so I want life to continue. And now that a virus is out there ready to infect anyone, I am privileged enough to be privileged enough, which must be unfair to some people. It must be unfair for a lot of people — this life. For the farmers to be working hard and nonstop so we get to eat when they themselves cannot. For the students and individuals, including myself, who try to turn up the volume of the voices of the unheard only to be silenced by someone who does not even dare to listen. For the people who have lesser than the people who have less to be put there, not by choice, but by injustice. For the ones who have lost someone because death is inevitable and money is essential. Today, I remember all of these as I celebrate what supposedly is a joyous yearly event.

Still joyous but more existential.

I am now twenty-two and the year is 2020. I say that as if I have just waited my whole life to get here.

So, what have I done yet? This is the question that haunts me every time I remember the chances that I have been given and have wasted. Flashbacks from the times I could have done better at this or that, or where I could have just finished this thing before doing that thing. I will always regret some things in my past at some points in my life. But I will also keep on reminding myself that I am where I am now because of that past. But to answer the question, I did nothing new and significant today. I washed the dishes and went for a very short walk.

Where am I right now? Mentally, I am still sane. Financially, zero. Physically, I am bloated and PMSing. Basically, alright.

My next destination? To betterment and continuous growth, hopefully. I heard they are beautiful places to be in with endless rocky roads!

My future plans? Definitely to keep on swimming.

And of course the classic question to test whether or not one has lived or is living a fulfilling life:

Am I happy? The whole world today says that I am and I would like to believe that.

Happy Easter Sunday and birthday to me, I guess.


Always,

Easter